Friday, November 16, 2007

The Adoptive Mother~ (soon that will be me!)

Well, we have now been waiting for almost 7 months. On the agency's unofficial list of parents waiting for referrals we are # 3...so perhaps in the next few weeks we will get that life altering phone call.

A member of the adoption forum found this article and shared it~

Being an adoptive mother is not for every woman. She must possess not only the natural mother instinct but an understanding and appreciation of the situation that brought a child into her arms making her a mother. The adoptive family came to be by choices made, choices made by the first parents and by the adoptive parents. This bond the adoptive mother has with her child grows over time, like the child did within his first mother’s womb. Day by day, touch by touch, with each tear, kiss, and memory made they became a family. Adoptive mothers have that special knack to let love grow.

An adoptive mother knows that she’s a mender of wounds, not just of the physical skinned knees with a band-aid and a kiss, but of the heart. She gives love, acceptance, and permission to ask and talk about the day the child was born and of his first parents.

Adoptive mothers are embracers, not only of the child with many hugs and kisses, but of the child’s heritage and history. She embraces the facts of her child’s past with strength for herself and the child.

She’s not only a memory maker planning family vacations, activities, and birthday parties, but also a memory keeper. Details of a birth, photos, and of the parents who brought the child into the world are kept along side the newspaper clipping that announced it all. All these things are kept in a special book that tells the whole story.

She’s a tier of shoelaces and of hearts. She weaves lives together into a tapestry of a new family, with many different brightly, colored threads showcasing their individualities and family origins. Together they create one unit attached to each other.

Adoptive mothers are experts at finding lost objects, but understand and validate the profound, deep loss left by adoption. She allows the tears to fall and grief to be felt, allowing the mourning of the mom not there. She is secure in knowing that she’s not a replacement, but a finisher of a race for someone who, for whatever reason, could not run any longer.

This role is not for the weak of spirit, or the easily wounded. Loving a child not born to her but calling him her own, but this is what she does, it is her calling. She is a mother.

Saturday, November 10, 2007

And still we wait...





One misconception people have about people who do not have children is that they have lots of time on their hands. If that were the case, we would have the garage and basement cleaned out and be twiddling our thumbs awaiting the arrival of our bundle of joy.
But since that is not the case, this week was a particularly busy one... I had report cards to do, as well as plan a surprise bridal shower and serve as "wedding coordinator" for a secret wedding for our friend S.R.G. She found her true love and the two of them are riding off into the sunset as husband and wife...well not really...they are driving to Arkansas to start their new life together. (the driving off into the sunset just sounded a bit more romantic)

We wish them all the best! We know that they will be fine as along as they remember- Marriage takes three- husband, wife and Jesus Christ.

Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Trick or Treat!

Since we know we will eventually get the call,even though we don't know when, we spend a lot of time reflecting on the changes that will come into our lives. Today is Halloween and of course regardless of your feelings on it- children love dressing up and getting candy. Next year,I will have a little person or persons with me when I answer the door to hand out candy or I will actually have to go Trick or Treating with children in tow. But until that time gets here, my favorite little trick or treater came over to show me her costume and get a few pieces of candy.

Ellis Land Can Be Pretty Scary at Halloween!

Saturday, October 13, 2007

and wait...

Today our church congregation, led by our pastor Rev. Ellis, walked to the site where our new church will be built. It was a gorgeous fall day for a stroll down Minnieville Road.


Sunday, September 9, 2007

While we wait...


There are tons of things we need to be doing while we wait for our call. We need to clean out our garage and basement to make way for all of the things children bring into a house.

But are we??.....Of course not!
We celebrated dad's 80th Birthday on September 8.
We all can only hope to look as good when we are 80!

I had the pleasure of serving as the Mistress of Ceremonies for the event.


It was nice to see his brothers and sisters together honoring their dad. We all wished his mom was well enough to attend the celebration.
We know many people our age who have lost one or both of their parents. We are truly blessed to have parents that are still with us.

Monday, August 13, 2007

Mesgana Dancers

Well, we've been waiting for 4 months...
While we wait for our referral we continue to read and learn about the beauty of the Ethiopian culture. I probably have more Ethiopian children's books than a native Ethiopian. On August 11, 2007, the day before our 18th wedding anniversary we went to see the Mesgana Dancers at George Washington University in DC. They were wonderful! Mesgana is the Amharic word for gratitude. Amharic is one of the many languages spoken in Ethiopia. The Mesgana dancers are a group of twelve students from the Children of Ethiopia Education Fund program. The COEEF is a non profit foundation that sponsors girls so they are afforded the opportunity to attend school. Opportunities for girls are limited in rural East Africa, epecially in education. Just think the amount of money we spend on one outfit will pay tutition, uniform and school supplies for a child for one year!

Enjoy the performance!

Tuesday, July 10, 2007

Wait, Wait, Waiting...

So how long will it take? The agency tells us that once our dossier is approved it takes anywhere from 6-8 months to get a referral. We have requested a male infant under 12 months old but we are open to twins or a sibling group of an infant and a child no older than 4. Once we receive a referral we wait for a travel date and clearance to fly to Ethiopia. While there, we will stay a week in the guest house connected to the orphanage.

So while we wait, we ask that you keep us in your prayers. We have been married for 18 years and this is truly going to change our lives. But we know who our strength comes from and we know that God has guided this entire process because only He could have made this decision possible for us.